October 11, 2013 by Kara Nichols
October 24, 2009 was my wedding day. Except it never took place. Instead, I had just been released from the hospital and my betrothed broke up with me.
Soon even the number 24 could trigger sadness in my heart! For example, if the time read 11:24 it would remind me that my wedding never took place. It was pretty intense. A deep sadness would fall on my heart. Hearing about or seeing pictures of a fall wedding? Felt like a death sentence. I was tormented everywhere I turned. I was having a hard time functioning in every day activities. Satan loved reminding me of my failure and rejection. He poked that bruise often.
But then as the days and years rolled by I fell so hard in love with a Savior and Heavenly Father, that the pain left my heart. It didn’t just walk away, God kicked it out.
I’m an Isaiah 61 girl now Look what God did for me, as He said He would:
“to comfort all who mourn,
3 and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the Lord
for the display of his splendor.”
I know there’s that saying: “Time heals all wounds,” but I don’t think that’s true. God is the only one who heals all wounds. And my own transformation has brought the Word alive in a brand new way. God is healer. And I’m living proof that He heals today. My heart is no longer broken! Praise Him.
God willing I will be repeating October many more times in my life. And now, what a gift to be able to look back and see that even on October 24, 2009, my Heavenly Father was there for me and had a plan even in the midst of pain. A plan to prosper, to give me hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).
It is magnificent, it is amazing, it is wonderful, and it’s even fun to have a relationship with God. By far the greatest adventure that life offers. I don’t want to get all preachy – but I feel led to offer this reminder: you too can experience freedom from past hurts and disappointments. You don’t have to be reminded constantly of your short comings or hurtful situations. There is freedom in the Lord, there is power in His name, and there is hope in Him when there is no hope left in you.
I won’t even pretend to have all of the answers, but I know the One who does! And I know He loves you. Yes, you. The verse that comes to mind right now is one I memorized as a child, but didn’t fully understand until years later. It’s John 3:16 and it says, “For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have everlasting life.”
I’m so thankful for that love. I thought I was destined to lead a lonely, sad, insane and meaningless existence. But God has restored my life beyond my wildest imagination. I’m so glad to be part of the Bride of Christ (Rev. 19:7-9). It’s the best bride to be.